Confessions Concerning Relational Bandwidth

How big is your Lego?

People are like Legos. We only have so many ways to connect. 

We can’t have deep relationships with everyone. It is important for you to own your limitations and prioritize your relationships.

You may have a different bandwidth than your friend, but you don’t have the ability to befriend everyone.

What’s your relational bandwidth? 

My wife and kids are out of town for the week visiting her family. Removing the most important relationships from my “Lego” has opened lots of time and energy for connecting with others. 

When it comes to relationships, I have a fairly large Lego. But even though I've shared a good portion of the evening with someone each night after work, there is no way to really fill all my time the way Abi and the kids do. 

I've noticed something… 

The pull of my phone and social-media relationships (even texting) has been far stronger than my pull to prayer. 

My digital counterfeits are fighting with my opportunity for communion.

I have unhurried and quiet moments to invest in my relationship with God. This is a rare gift for a pastor and father of young children.

The sugar-rush of digital relationships calls out like an addiction. Instagram, texting, Facebook all calling for time that my kids would normally fill… that I could fill with prayer now.

I normally have to work to make Lego space for my relationship with God. That’s still true when I have time on my hands!

I’ve been humbled to recognize I’m drifting toward filling the Lego with everyone but God when the opportunity is right in front of me. 

I suppose this is turning into more of a confession than a “post.” I thought might be helpful for you to hear a brother struggle to invest in his single most important relationship. 

One of my life goals is that my prayer life would be my most cherished relationship. This free time showed me I still have room to grow! 

I’m reminded of John Piper’s powerful quote, “One of the great uses of Twitter and Facebook will be to prove at the Last Day that prayerlessness was not from lack of time.” 

This also causes me to reflect on the fact that the distractions and challenges of making time for walking with God may change–but they don’t seem to disappear.

Maybe we always need to protect some of the Lego for prayer?

Praying for you as you work to walk with God too!